Sweet Dreams
by kyliesmilie26
Summary: Kate is shot at Captain Montgomery's funeral. Or is she? Did Castle get there in time? 'I'd always take a bullet for you Kate...' Things take an interesting turn from here. Spoilers for 3x24. Give it a chance!
1. Chapter 1

**AN:** I am seriously debating whether this is even worth writing. I mean, there are literally hundreds of post-finale fics based on the absolutely **amazing **_Knockout_. How many more can one read? That said, I really could not pass this idea up when it came to me, and the episode just screams out for a fic to be based around... doesn't it? Obviously if you have yet to see _Knockout_, stop here... unless you want to be spoiled. ;)

**Title:** _Sweet Dreams (Stand beside me)_

**Summary: **My take on what could happen after the cameras stop rolling on 3x24. I seriously doubt anything like this WILL happen. It's like less than 0% chance I would think! Right, you want a decent summary though don't you? :p ;)

Kate is shot at Captain Montgomery's funeral. Or is she? Did Castle get there in time? _I'd always take a bullet for you Kate... _Things take an interesting turn from here. Okay, you've probably seen a What if Castle is shot instead fic but give it a chance, it takes a twist I think you'll enjoy. :)

**Tagline: If you had the chance to speak from the heart if you got a second chance, would you? Could you let go of your fears?**

**Standalone or serial? **Standa... no wait, it's serial this time. ;) ;D *screams* WHY? I don't have the time to commit to a series fic... I guess that's what this wonderful wonderful crazy good episode will do to the muse. Damn I hate my muse...

**Prologue**

***C&B***

The sun is brightly shining. It's a complete contrast to how Katherine Beckett feels. _It should be bloody pouring its guts out today. That would suit my mood so much better_. "Hmm but it's only fitting that it's such a lovely day, Roy deserves nothing less."

Her thoughts were quite literally all over the place; her heart stamped upon and shattered into tiny pieces by the betrayal she felt from her beloved mentor and friend. Yet at the same time she was still in awe and amazed by what he had done. He had sacrificed his life for hers. And that is exactly why she had told the boys that no-one outside _this_ family were to know, to everyone Captain Roy Montgomery had died a hero.

She stepped up to the microphone to give her eulogy. To say she was nervous was an understatement. She wanted to make sure that everyone in attendance knew _exactly_ the kind of man Roy was. How much he means to everyone at the 12th, what he means to her, and just how much of an influence he had on her; how he had helped make her the detective she is today.

She turned to the man who had become her best friend and partner. She knew that he would give her that little kick she found that she needed to do this. Despite what she had told him in the heat of the battle, he _did_ know her; scarily so. He probably knew her better than she knew herself at times. _Roy was right. I **did **have no fun before Castle. I can't imagine my life without him in it._ They shared a strong bond; a connection that ran deep into their core. This was both a huge comfort and incredibly frightening all at once.

"Roy Montgomery taught me what it meant to be a cop. He taught me that we are bound by our choices, but we are more than our mistakes.

Captain Montgomery once said to me that for us there is no victory. There are only battles. And in the end the best you can hope for is to find a place to make your stand. And if you're very lucky you find someone willing to stand with you."

At this point she again turned to the writer. She wanted him to get the underlying message she so desperately wanted to convey to him. _It's you I want to stand beside; it's you who gets me. No one else. You're my partner. No one else._ It was no coincidence that he was the one standing next to her right now. And she wouldn't want it any other way.

_It's you I'm in lo...Wait, did I just say love?_

Their eyes met. They held each other's gaze for what felt like an era, but in reality was only a few moments. They had become so good at holding conversations through their eyes. She turned back to check her prepared notes, ready to finish; safe in the knowledge that she had reached an understanding with her partner. That she was sorry and she understood why he did what he did days earlier.

***C&B***

Richard Castle took his rightful place beside his Kate. He wasn't going to be anywhere else while she read out her eulogy. It wasn't very often he saw her in uniform. In fact, this was the first time he had seen her in full uniform period. The reason why was highly disconcerting. Roy's funeral. A death he realised he had a massive part of. Sure he didn't pull the trigger, but he may as well have. If only he hadn't looked into Johanna Beckett's case...

_Still I saved Beckett's life that night._ And that was what kept him from completely falling victim to his guilt. It was _him_ who pulled a highly distraught (and fighting) Beckett into his arms and whisked her out of sight. It was him who held her when she broke; he kept her upright. And she did quite literally, break. He had _never_ seen Katherine Beckett that vulnerable before in his life. He _had_ thought her to be almost indestructible. And that night... she had frightened the life out of him, she _never_ cried; but that gut-wrenching scream got him every single time. He only hoped he had comforted her in some small way, even just simply stroking her hair he hoped eased her pain.

"... the best you can hope for is to find a place to make your stand. And if you're very lucky you find someone willing to stand with you."

_Damn daydreaming. I could have missed something of great significance because you couldn't stop your thoughts from going back to that night._

When she turned towards him, he was there waiting. He was her partner - no one else, and he wanted her to know that. _You know that don't you Kate? I'm your partner, and I'm willing to make that stand with you._

"Our Captain would want us to carry on the fight."

It was then something caught his eye. Something was reflecting in the daylight. He was on instant alert. Something wasn't right. Kate's words started to fade out as he concentrated solely on that spot a good 500 metres away from them.

_Oh sh!t..._

"KATE!" He yelled, crashing into her, the force of gravity pushing them down into the ground.

***C&B***

She heard him scream her name; her first name as she felt the weight of him drag her to the soft grass below. _Or not so soft._ She thought, as she landed with a thud, her cap falling off in the process.

_Oh crap. I think I'm in trouble here..._

"Oh Kate...ssh.. Kate" She heard him whisper, she could see his face etched with growing concern as he hovered over her.

***C&B***

Her pristine white glove was stained with blood. Her blood?

Her voice startled him out of his thoughts. "Castle can you get off me? I'm okay."

His response was somewhat slow to come. And this worried her. "Ah yeah, course."

"Ahh." He groaned, as he tried to lift himself off her. "Oh f**k."

Kate's eyes widened in shock. _NO NO NO... He can't be... Please? God, no..._

"Castle?" Her voice had more than a tinge of fear and vulnerability in its tone. Something that was not often there.

She tried desperately to find the wound. _Where the hell did he get hit?_

"Castle, you're gonna be okay. You hear me? You are NOT going to die on me, okay?"

_"Stay with me Kate. Don't leave me, please?"_

_Where did **that** come from?_ "I'm not going anywhere Castle. And you won't be either. You hear me Rick?" She couldn't seem to do anything but just stare into his eyes.

_"Stay with me okay?"_

_Why does he keep telling me that?_ "Castle, stay with me. Stay with ME. You don't get to do this to me." She could no longer stop her tears from rapidly falling down her face.

_Kate, I love you. I love you Kate."_

"Castle? Castle? Open your eyes! Open your goddamn eyes!" She could hardly see now, (damn tears), and she was finding it harder and harder to breathe. "Rick, you can't leave me! Please? You are not dying on me, not before I can tell you I love you...please?" _Just hold on for me..._

**TBC...**

**AN:** Thanks for reading. :D Thoughts? Okay, you've probably already seen this countless times already, but I'm really hoping you'll stick with it cos things are going to take a bit of a twist from here... :D

Please let me know if it's worth continuing? ;)


	2. Chapter 2  really Chapter 1

**AN:** Thank you all so much for taking the time to read the prologue and for your lovely reviews. I am staggered by the number of story alerts and/or listed as a favourite story. As I mentioned before, it is your incredible support that is the driving force behind my motivation to continue to write. So you have more than a big hand in whatever the muse decides to put to paper. ;D :-*

I dedicate this fic to you amazing and wonderful readers. You guys are just incredible.

**Please go and check out Linda's (superlc529) _Connection_. It is a wonderful wonderful piece of fiction.**

Oh and I have a feeling you'll probably have a fair idea as to who was REALLY shot by the end of this chapter... hope you all enjoy the twist I have coming your way. ;D

**Chapter One**

***C&B***

_Richard Castle was dead. Richard Castle was dead. Richard Castle was dead._

That was all Katherine Beckett could think about. Her shadow, her best friend, her partner had died. And the thing that ate at her the most was the fact that he died because of _her_. He had taken the bullet meant for her. _Castle, I hate you... why?_

"He's never going to know just how much he meant to me even before he became my partner."

This was the man who had saved her from herself and the unforgiving darkness that was mere inches away from destroying her soul when her mother was murdered. _And the irony of the whole freaking mess was that it was my mother's case that killed him_.

She wasn't sure how the hell she would escape its dark clutches this time; the source of her happiness had been cruelly taken from her. _Who's gonna save me this time?_

She didn't care that she was sitting in the dark. It was the perfect parallel to her ugly mood. She wanted nothing more than to join two of her favourite people in the entire world at this very moment.

So many people dead. _Because of me..._

"This has to stop." She vowed, throwing her coffee mug with a force she didn't know she possessed. It shattered as it hit the wall, landing on the tiled floor, shards of ceramic scattering everywhere. She stared at the broken pieces for several moments, feeling some relief at having **_broken_** something. Something other than her shattered heart.

"I am going to get these sons of b****s for this. First my mother, then Roy and now Castle. Someone is going to pay. No one takes my Castle away from me. No one."

***C&B***

In complete contrast to a few days prior, the sun was nowhere to be seen. Threatening clouds were obscuring the blue skies hiding behind them.

For the second time in a week she was donned in her full police attire. It didn't matter that he wasn't actually a cop, he was her partner and he was just a good a cop as any trained detective. He deserved the trimmings that every befallen member before him had received. This time though, she wore her hair down, allowing her cascading curls to sit naturally around her face. She knew Castle liked her hair down the best.

_Life just isn't fair. I should not be doing this... I shouldn't have to put my best friend in the ground. I don't want to do this._

Tears had become her closest friend. Each time she cried, she thought she couldn't possibly cry anymore than she already had. But every time she was wrong. _Damn it Rick, you have turned me into a freaking girl. I've become a blubbering mess_.

"Get yourself together Kate. You've got a eul-" She could not finish that thought. That would mean that she would have to admit to herself that she was giving the eulogy of the one and only Richard Castle. Her writer, the man who pulled her pigtails and allowed her to just be _Kate _as opposed to straight-laced, no-nonsense Detective Beckett. Her one and done.

She was vaguely aware of her friends and family around her. But it was like she was in her own little world where no one could get through to her. She didn't want anyone to see her break; the only one who she would trust to catch her when she fell was not there. So she kept herself hidden.

A small part of her realised how selfish she was being. If there was anyone who should be ripping apart at the seams it was Alexis. She had lost her father. And by god, she knew what that felt like. It was something you would never recover from - sure you could put the pieces back together with a rally of support around you but you would never be the same. Losing a parent was something she would not wish on her worst enemy. Except maybe the person who was ultimately responsible for all of this.

Again she stepped up to a microphone. It did not surprise her at the sheer number of people attending his funeral. He was a well-known and much loved writer who was admired by many. Her instinct when in need was to search for the face of her partner, but stopped in her tracks when she realised that she couldn't do that now. _He's not there, he's not there..._

With a shaky breath and a pounding heart she began.

"When I first met Richard Castle I thought he was an annoying child on a sugar-rush who grated on my nerves. He thought he could charm his way out of anything, and if I'm brutally honest, he probably could. He just had that vibrant personality with a smile that would warm even the coldest heart.

He was liitle more than a nuisance when he first started shadowing me. He would _not_ listen to me when I told him to stay in the car; he just had to be part of the action. And he always had these crazy theories... but more often than not those theories would be on the money.

As time went on, he became more than just my shadow. And I know I was more than just his muse. He became a real asset to us at the 12th. He helped us solve so many cases. He may not have had a badge, but he was my partner. He always had my back, and I will never forget the times he saved my life... and that he paid the ultimate price on my behalf.

He created some fine heroes in his books. But to me, Richard Castle is a _real_ hero. And my biggest regret is that I didn't tell him how much he _truly_ meant to me. That he is my best friend and that I love him. He forced down my walls that I had put up around me; and somewhere along the line stole my heart.

Until we meet again Rick. I'll always love you..."

There she had admitted it out loud. She loved him. If only she had had the guts to say it to his face while he was alive...

_I wish this was some horrible nightmare that I could wake up from..._

***C&B***

She awoke to the smell of coffee. Proper coffee, not that "monkey-acid-pee" coffee that they had had at the 12th before Castle took matters into his own hands and got a real coffee machine. And he was right, it was ghastly compared to the real thing.

Oddly, the aroma she loved so much made her feel nauseated. She didn't give this another thought as she became aware of her surroundings. She sat up, unable to do anything but look around the familiar room. _This is not my couch, that is definitely not my tv..._

_I should **not** be here..._

"So I was thinking..."

That voice. _I should **not** be hearing that voice._

She slowly turned to the direction the voice was coming from. Before her very eyes was her partner. _No freaking way_. "_Castle?_" She whispered, her jaw slackened in shock.

"We back to Castle are we?" He teased. "Okay, what have I done wrong?"

Her green eyes went even wider in her astonishment. She could not process what was going on. Castle did die taking the bullet meant for her. Didn't he? Why was she here in his loft? How was he standing here in front of her, obviously alive and well? None of it made sense.

Castle had become more concerned as she became more and more engrossed in her thoughts. His first reaction was to make sure she was okay; make her feel better. He slowly walked over to her, sitting down beside her. He took her hand and drew circles on it, hoping this gesture would soothe her. Usually a gentle touch from him when she needed comfort was enough. But he sensed that this was different.

"Hey, you okay?"

_He's holding my hand.. I can feel his touch_.

He was really worried now. "Kate? What's wrong baby?"

_Baby?_

She finally found her voice, somehow stumbling upon the words she needed to ask. "You.. you... you're alive?" She managed to stutter. Why was it that she was crying again?

With his free hand, he tenderly cupped her cheek, brushing away her tears. "Course I'm alive. I'm right here."

"Really?" Her voice had taken on a childlike quality.

He nodded. "I'm here baby."

He pulled her into his arms, and she fell into his warm embrace; breathing him in. She cried freely, her tears soaking his shirt. He mumbled sweet nothings into her hair.

She finally looked up into his blue eyes. The blue eyes she'd never thought she'd see again and answered the question that he wasn't asking very loudly.

"You were dead. You died before I got the chance to tell you, to tell you that I'm in love with you."

"Oh Kate, it's okay, it's okay."

**TBC...**

**AN:** So... how about that huh guys? I think it's pretty obvious as to what's going on but hey, I hope you'll come along for the ride anyway. ;) ;D I was hoping to keep you guessing a bit longer but the muse takes me in unexpected directions... it's still where I wanted to go, just not necessarily in the way I thought when I sat down to write it. ;)

Thanks for reading. ;D Thoughts? Hope it lived up to your expectations. :)


	3. Ch 2

**AN:** Again, thanks to you all for your amazing reviews. I can't get over how many of you guys have put this story on your alert list or favourites! You all just blow me away with your awesomeness. :D As always, you wonderful readers are my inspiration to continue. The muse thanks you from the bottom of its heart. ;) :D

Hope you enjoy...

**Chapter Two**

***C&B***

She stared into his baby blues, which were depicting love and concern. Suddenly, she felt angry. Angry at everything she had been through in the last few weeks, months. Angry at him. Perhaps it was directed unfairly towards him, but for all intents and purposes he was supposed to be dead. _What does he mean it's okay? He died... right in my freaking arms..._

"It's _not _okay Castle. You died. You f***ing died in **my **arms and now you're here supposedly alive? How can you tell me that it's freaking okay?"

To his credit, Rick held her fiery, steely gaze. He subconsciously began to thread his fingers through her long wavy locks. He brought her tear-stained face to his, their foreheads touching. He put a finger to her lips. "Ssh, Kate, ssh. It was just a bad dream."

As quickly as she felt her anger rise, it was subsiding just as rapidly. She was amazed at this gentle and loving Castle. She knew that he readily displayed these qualities, but she could not remember being on the receiving end. Okay, maybe she had, but refused to see it before now. She cried even harder, a feat she thought not humanly possible. "How can you say it was just a bad dream Rick? You died, taking a bullet meant for me, for **me**. And the last thing I remember is reading your blasted eulogy at your funeral and hating myself for not telling you how that I loved you."

"A nightmare then?" Castle suggested, trying to bring some levity to the situation as he so often did when things started to get too serious for his liking. To say he was concerned for the woman sobbing so brokenly beside him was an understatement. _This dream has seriously shaken her up if the last thing she thinks she remembers is my funeral_.

She swatted his arm without even thinking. "Castle, don't. I am seriously freaking out here. What the hell is happening to me? I am talking to a f***ing ghost."

He looked at her, feeling some tears beginning to water his eyes at her utter confusion. She looked so lost. "Oh baby, ssh, ssh. How can I be a ghost when I am right here beside you?"

She shook her head in bewilderment. "I don't know. I feel like I've lost my mind Rick. You _have_ to be a figment of my imagination. You aren't really here. You're not."

Castle had come to the end of his rope. He really had no idea why she was acting so strangely. _What else can I do to convince her I'm not dead?_ A lightbulb went off in his head as he remembered something she had said some moments earlier.

_"You died before I got the chance to tell you, to tell you that I love you ...is reading your blasted eulogy and hating myself for not telling you that I loved you."_

_She doesn't remember us being together?_

"Don't have an answer to that do you Rick?"

Her voice brought him out of his stupor. He stared into her beautiful green eyes. Those eyes he loved so much showing so much sadness and confusion. It broke his heart. He just wanted to make all of that disappear for her. "Oh yes I do Kate."

Before she was aware of what was happening she felt his lips on hers. He was kissing her. Hard. It was not unlike the kiss they shared under the ruse of being undercover. _Holy freaking hell. Richard Castle is kissing me. And it's freaking AMAZING._ Despite her only remembering them kissing that one time, it felt like they had done this plenty of times before. It had a strong sense of familiarity that she couldn't quite place.

She kissed him back. And boy did it feel good. _If this is a dream, I have died and gone to heaven. If it's not... I am not wasting another moment. This man is my one and done. End of story_.

After what felt like an eternity he pulled away. But only because the need to breathe had become an issue. He stared lovingly, longingly, into her eyes. Even after all this time, he could not get enough of kissing his Kate. He could not believe at times that he was allowed to do this whenever he liked. Maybe not when they were at the precinct, as she liked to remain professional at work... but that didn't mean they didn't share stolen kisses and moments.

"That convince you that I'm alive?" He asked huskily.

All she could do was nod stupidly. She still had no idea what was going on, but if he kept kissing her like that then she didn't give a damn.

"Castle?" She was not surprised to find her voice just as hoarse as his. (He would call it sultry.)

"Yeah?"

It was her turn to caress his cheek, cupping it gently in her hand. "I love you. You're my partner, my best friend and I love you." She sighed, looking down at her lap. "I just wanted you to know that."

"Oh Kate, I know. And I love you too. So much."

She smiled, for the first time in what felt like forever. Well at least since he died... or maybe he hadn't? She didn't have a bloody clue anymore. She couldn't help herself, she brought her lips to his, kissing him with everything she had.

***C&B***

Richard Castle sat anxiously in an uncomfortable chair. He stared at his blood-stained hands. Her blood. He had her blood on his hands. He knew he should go and wash it off but he would not leave this room until he knew she was okay.

Everyone was in the room with him, nervously waiting for news on his Kate. He knew they were there, but all he could think about was _her_. He just had to know that she would pull through from this. She had been in surgery for hours now; it felt like a freaking eternity.

_She cannot die. She cannot die. Please? She has to be okay. She has to be okay. I can't lose her, not now. Not ever._

For what felt like the umpteenth time his mind flashed back to the moment his whole world turned on its head...

It was then something caught his eye. Something was reflecting in the daylight. He was on instant alert. Something wasn't right. Kate's words started to fade out as he concentrated solely on that spot a good 500 metres away from them.

_Oh sh!t..._

"KATE!" He yelled, crashing into her, the force of gravity pushing them down into the ground.

There was chaos all around him, but he took little notice as he pulled himself off the ground. He looked at his Kate, who's cap had been knocked off when they fell. She looked like she was going into shock, her eyes were wide open with fear.

His face was etched with growing concern as he hovered over her. "Oh Kate...ssh.. Kate."

It was then he noticed her glove. Her pristine white glove was stained with blood. She had been hit. She had been hit.

_Oh f**k..._

"Stay with me Kate. Don't leave me, please?"

She wasn't speaking. And that frightened the hell out of him. All she could do was stare at him, her breaths coming in short, sharp gasps that he knew had to hurt. He could begin to see her losing her battle to keep her eyes open. He needed to keep talking; he had to keep her from falling asleep. "Stay with me okay?"

She still didn't speak. He knew it was bad if she couldn't even tell him to shut up. His mother's words kept playing in his mind. _Don't you dare waste another moment_. He had to tell her. He had to tell her now. "Kate, I love you. I love you Kate."

Maybe his highly agitated mind was playing tricks on him, but he was sure he saw a hint of a smile play on her lips for a moment. He saw a single tear leaking from her eye just before her eyes rolled into the back of her head. He desperately hoped he had heard her, and that she would remember this later. _Just hold on for me... don't leave me Kate._

"Don't you dare give up on me Katherine Beckett. Don't you dare. I need you. Your dad needs you. The 12th need you."

He was pushed out of the way as paramedics came over to attend to his severely injured partner. He hated seeing her so fragile, her skin so ashen. This was not his Kate. "Come on Kate, you can do this. Just stay with me okay? You need to stay with me..."

"Yo Castle?" A voice startled him out of his hellish daydream. He looked up to see Esposito beside him. "She's gonna be fine man, you hear me?"

He nodded sullenly.

"Family of Detective Beckett?" A doctor appeared from nowhere, dressed in those green scrubs. Castle suddenly realised that he hated scrubs.

"That's us." Jim Beckett replied. "How is my daughter?"

***C&B***

Kate was perfectly content lying in Castle's arms. Again she felt a strong sense of familiarity. In addition she felt warm and safe. Something she had not felt for some time. She still felt like everything was turned on its head but she couldn't care less. _I never want to move again._

"You tired?"

"No." She replied inbetween a yawn.

"Uh huh, think you gave yourself away there with your yawn." He smirked, kissing her forehead.

"I'm not tired." She yawned again. _Damn it._

He chuckled at her stubborness. He felt a strong sense of relief to see a glimpse of his Kate back. "Sure you're not."

"Don't tease me Rick or I'll kick you where it hurts and pull your ear to LA."

"Apples Apples!" He put his hands up in surrender.

"God you're easy!" She smirked, snuggling down into the warmth that emanated from him.

A comfortable silence fell upon them for several moments. They were more than happy just lying in each other's arms. He fingered the tendrils of her hair. Kate was beginning to discover that he quite liked to do that, and more to the point, she loved it when he did.

He was the one who broke the silence. "Seriously though, you should get some rest. It's very important."

She was thoroughly confused, and more than a little part of her did not want to go to sleep. She didn't want to wake up to find that she was dreaming and he really was dead.

"Why?"

"Because you've got a little Castle growing inside you."

Her eyes widened in shock, her jaw slackened. "Uh...I what?"

**TBC...**

**AN: **Well what did you think guys? Still worth reading? ? I was torn between keeping you guessing a bit longer but decided not to...

I must say I was not expecting the first part to be so emotional and angsty but hey, the muse will write what it chooses. ;) Hope you're still enjoying the journey and feedback is love.

Thanks for reading. :D You guys are all awesome! :D


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